61: The Hidden Gift in Every Feeling

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Welcome to the With Intention weekly newsletter where I share ideas & learnings to help you live & lead with intention

At a glance:

• Essay: The Hidden Gift in Every Feeling
• Quote: Your emotions aren't obstacles to overcome
• Visual: Feelings

Hey friend,

I've got to ask you something, and I want you to be honest with me.

When someone asks how you're feeling, what do you usually say?

If you're anything like I was for most of my life, you probably default to "fine" or "good" or "busy." Sound familiar?

Here's the thing, I spent years helping other leaders develop authentic relationships while I was completely disconnected from my own emotions. Talk about irony : )

What Changed Everything

Last month, Michelle and I went to this marriage retreat called Breakthrough. Julia Woods was teaching, and she said something that hit me like a freight train:

Every emotion carries both light and shadow.

Think about that. Even the feelings you love have potential downsides. And even the emotions you've been running from? They're trying to give you something valuable.

This insight, combined with Chip Dodd's work in "The Voice of the Heart," have completely shifted how I think about feelings. I realized the goal isn't to feel good all the time, it's to listen to what your emotions are actually telling you.

Here's What You Need to Know

You know that fear you've been avoiding? It might be trying to give you wisdom.

That anger that keeps showing up? Could be pointing you toward something that needs to change.

The sadness you've been pushing down? It's probably trying to deepen your compassion.

Even your joy—when it's unchecked—can sometimes disconnect you from reality.

The whole is greater than the sum of its parts, and that includes your emotional life.

My Honest Confession

I'll be straight with you. There have been countless times I've just numbed difficult emotions instead of dealing with them. Staying busy, diving into work, finding distractions—anything to avoid sitting with discomfort.

But here's what I've learned: you can't lead others to places you haven't been willing to go yourself.

So, I started something simple. Each day, I try to identify one or two specific emotions I'm feeling. Not judge them. Not fix them. Just notice them intentionally.

Last week, I felt fear creeping in around a big business decision. Instead of pushing it away, I asked myself: "What's this fear trying to protect? What wisdom might it contain?"

Turns out, the fear wasn't about failure. It was about moving too fast without building the right foundation. That insight completely changed my approach and strengthened our long-term strategy.

Your struggles can become your greatest competitive advantage when you approach them systematically.

Your Emotional Awareness Framework

Here's what's worked for me, and I think it'll work for you:

Locate - What are you actually feeling right now? Give it a real name, not just "stressed."

Listen - Ask yourself: "What is this emotion trying to tell me?"

Learn - What's the potential gift in this feeling? What's the potential trap?

Lead - How can this guide your next intentional action instead of a knee-jerk reaction?

Link - How does this connect to who you're becoming?

Why This Matters for Your Leadership

This isn't just personal development fluff. When you develop real emotional awareness, you make better decisions under pressure. You build deeper trust with your team. You navigate conflict more effectively.

Most importantly, you create space for others to be authentic too.

The leaders who hide their emotional reality are the ones who plateau fastest. The breakthrough happens when you realize that being emotionally honest isn't weakness but your secret weapon.

What I Know After 25 Years

Elite performance requires the courage to feel fully while acting intentionally. You can't transform what you won't acknowledge.

Your emotions—all of them—contain intelligence. They become your guidance system instead of roadblocks.

Here's What I Want You to Do

Before you move on to the next email in your inbox, try this:

Right now, identify one specific emotion you're experiencing. What's really going on beneath the surface? 

Ask yourself: What might this feeling be trying to teach me?

Then take one small step based on that insight today.

You don't have to be perfect at this. I'm certainly not. But systematic authenticity starts with one honest moment.

Ready to Go Deeper?

If you try that emotion check-in exercise, hit reply and let me know what you discovered. I read every response, and your honesty helps build the kind of community where real transformation happens.

Sometimes the most powerful conversations happen when we're willing to be real about what we're actually feeling.

With intention,

Jon

P.S. Michelle and I are still unpacking everything from that retreat. It's amazing how being authentic in one area of your life strengthens every other area. The whole really is greater than the sum of its parts.

Feelings

Source: Juiia Woods (inspired by Chip Dodd)

Until next week!

Jon Giganti 

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